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Be Your Own Best Friend

December 21, 2020 by Wendy Toth

So many of my clients and I share one thing in common, we are incredibly hard on ourselves.

Raise your hand if you are a high achiever with perfectionist tendencies. (Guilty). 

We tend to disregard all the amazing things we have done as being no big deal. Then we focus exclusively on what we haven’t gotten around to yet, or poke holes in our own good ideas by imagining every single thing that could go wrong.

We would never treat our friends this way.

How to Be Your Own Best Friend

It’s so easy to see all the places our friends shine and praise them for it. I want each and every one of us to get better at doing this for ourselves. We need to be our own friends.

While being tough on ourselves can be SO GREAT for things like getting good grades, paying the mortgage, and getting our work done on time, there is a pretty big downside.

When we reach a certain level in life, we become so focused on avoiding the bad that we inadvertently avoid the good too. We simply fight to stay put.

Over time we ball up more and more tightly in this space.

There’s a famous quote from Anais Nin, “And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom.”

When you look back on your year, does this quote ring true in some way?

It’s been a painful year. It’s been a beautiful one too. And a sad one. And a hopeful one. Everybody reading this has a lot to be proud of.

Imagine You Are Your Own Best Friend

Imagine you are speaking to a friend. What would you praise yourself for, big or small? Don’t cringe too much, don’t qualify every compliment with a “but,” just lay on the praise.

Think about it. Write it down. Sit with it.

You did good things. Really good things.

For 1-on-1 support on improving your satisfaction or confidence when it comes to your work-life, book a free mini career coaching consultation with me! 

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Flower Bud Image from Stux on Pixabay.

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About PowerSuiting I’m Wendy, a long-time journalist and career coach. I started PowerSuiting to help other creative women get ahead, without giving up who they are. Wondering if I can support you in a career transition? Book a FREE call with me.

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